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Unread 11-23-2004, 08:42 PM   #1
John D.
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Post A Happy Thanksgiving to all that celebrate it.....

A lot of you are leaving to visit family and friends over the next day - so I figured I'd post this tonight.....

Have a wonderful, safe and blessed Thanksgiving!!!

And remember..... (copious re-writes here)

If you are having the family back to your house for a Turkey dinner - you are free to plan as I do.....

For example, the way I see it - an average male at 200 lbs. eats about 2 lbs of Turkey (women eat less - so you should be good there...). So - if you have 10 guests plus you and your wife - that's 12(guests)x2(lbsofmeat)x200(lbsperperson) - which I think is about a 4,000 lb Turkey. You should be good to go - after you find that 4000 pound bird........

TIP: - Turkey is best fresh. So if you buy your 4000 lb bird today - you'll have to feed it about 200 lbs of grain per day - 'till you whack it with an axe in the neck on Thursday morning. I saw it on Martha Stewart that an axe is the best way to dispatch a Turkey. This year - I have no idea how Martha will dispatch it - as I'm pretty sure she can't go wielding an axe or anything (or so I was informed by an insider...).

TIP: - If you opt for a frozen Turkey - well - you'll still need about 4000 lbs of bird, but - to test for freshness - shoot your Luger at the frozen Turkey at - oh - about 10 yards at your local range. If the bullet penetrates to the giblets - it's good to go - and OK to eat. If not - return it to the store and ask for an exchange. Do this until 1) you have a bird where a bullet can pass cleanly through the meat and into the giblets - or - 2) the store runs out of Turkey.

TIP: - Preparation is key. Remember, the center of the bird must be cooked through. A handy way to tell is if the bullet you shot in the above step begins to melt. When it does - it's done. Don't count on the "pop-up" things to work - ours never do, but you may be lucky - and your bird's thingy actually pops out. If it does - take pictures - as I've never seen a bird's thingy popped out, cooked or uncooked, but since this is a "G" rated forum, I won't go there....

And finally - Thanksgiving only comes once per year, so posts like this only come once a year as well. For that - you should be thankful....

I know I am.. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" />

Best to all â?? and a wonderful thanksgiving holiday to allâ?¦..

John D.
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Unread 11-23-2004, 08:47 PM   #2
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<img border="0" alt="[cheers]" title="" src="graemlins/beerchug.gif" />

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Unread 11-23-2004, 09:06 PM   #3
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Hello John D.,

Excellent preparation suggestions, I'll get on them right away since you are the first one to ever tell me what needs to be done. It always helps to have either a good cookbook or instructions from an HK expert like yourself.

Happy Thanksgiving To All,
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Unread 11-23-2004, 09:27 PM   #4
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana,Tahoma,Arial,Helvetica,Geneva">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana,Tahoma,Arial,Helvetica,Geneva">Originally posted by ToggleTop:
<strong>......you are the first one to ever tell me what needs to be done. ....</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana,Tahoma,Arial,Helvetica,Geneva">Hey T.T.,

I'm quite certain that if you follow my calculations and instructions to the letter - Thanksgiving will be the only Holiday you'll have to cook for in a whole year - what with "leftovers" and such <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" />

Seriously - my thanks - and a Happy Thanksgiving to all..!

John D.
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Unread 11-23-2004, 09:32 PM   #5
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An interesting message from a past President of the United States on our Country and Thanksgiving.
It still seems appropriate to me in our current times. Enjoy the Holiday. I am cooking for a dozen folks and loving every minute of it. Two smoked Turkeys (in a water smoker) should start things off nicely. Scroll down to the middle of the page on this link to view his message for our citzens.
Abraham Lincoln's Thanksgiving Message
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Unread 11-24-2004, 10:24 AM   #6
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A blessed Thanksgiving to all... may we be truely grateful for the the daily blessings in our lives.
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Unread 11-24-2004, 03:24 PM   #7
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I want to thank our American troops
serving far from family and friends...
...who give of their courage and blood
to keep enemies from our shores and liberty in our lives.
To all our guardians, friends, and neighbors...
HAPPY THANKSGIVING!
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Unread 11-25-2004, 02:28 AM   #8
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If you will, please say a prayer for our brave men,and women in uniform. I am truly thankful for them. God bless and keep them all.
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